Is your check engine light on?

Some of us are in the habit of ignoring when our body’s check engine light is on—or totally unaware that such a thing exists. Meanwhile, our energy is leaking everywhere, putting us at risk for burnout or breakdown. That’s when we finally call Roadside Service (doctors and others) for help. Yet prevention is always the best medicine. Now that we’ve survived the holidays, it’s a good time to assess: Where do we wish to invest our precious energy this year?

Malfunction alert

The real name of a car’s check engine light is the Malfunction Indicator Lamp (MIL). Its responsibility is to alert the driver to an issue that’s disrupting a vehicle’s performance. There’s a lot riding on that tiny light’s shoulders.

When it comes to our personal vehicle, our body, many of us monitor our water, our steps, our calories, our sleep, and more. But how often do we pay attention to how much energy we’re doling out as we journey through our days?

For example, we may push ourselves physically, at work or home, until there’s absolutely nothing left in the tank. Or over-extend our emotional energy by feeling responsible for others and even the whole world. Or tap out our mental energy with stories about unresolved conflicts, worries about the future, or regrets about the past.

Meanwhile, we wonder why we’re exhausted and frustrated—or stuck in neutral going nowhere fast, like our own version of the movie Groundhog Day.

These are all signs that our body’s check engine light is on. In other words, a warning to stop, open the hood, and see what needs our attention.

Math not mathing

Ironically, when we continue pushing past the warnings of our body’s check engine light, we usually see it as a good thing, like Martha Stewart says. More tasks completed today equals fewer tasks tomorrow, right?

But the math never adds up because the tasks are never-ending.

Worse yet, we sacrifice quantity for quality. Not only in what we actually accomplish (more mistakes, less joy, meaning, or purpose in what we’re doing)  but also in how we feel and how we show up in our lives. (Exhaustion lowers our personal vibration or life force, leading to mental and physical issues.)

We all have our “tells” that our check engine light is screaming for attention: Cravings for snacks, cigarettes, or alcohol. Snapping at people or pets for no good reason. Isolating or disengaging from everyone and everything.

Unfortunately, instead of looking at the root cause, we usually blame ourselves for lacking “will power” or losing our temper or our patience.

A radical act

Most of us recognize that machines break down when not cared for properly. But we seem to think we can abuse our human vessels forever.

Consider all the ways our society idealizes exhaustion: Doctors, nurses, and caregivers who regularly power through 24-hour shifts. Athletes and weekend warriors who push through pain and fatigue. Working moms who manage more than two full time jobs—because moms are on duty 24/7/365. (Some dads, too, but statistics show that females still ‘lead’ in this area.)

This quote from Slow Girl Season on Instagram sums it up: Rest is a radical act of self-love in a world that glorifies exhaustion.

For many of us, there doesn’t seem to be a choice in the matter. After all, bills must be paid, families cared for, jobs to perform. Who has time to rest?

Yet the wear and tear on us is real.

So, while it may seem radical and downright impossible, we will eventually pay a steep price for ignoring our check engine light.

Open the hood

We often run down our energy reserves by taking on responsibilities out of fear, habit, or a need to maintain control. We may be uncomfortable with setting boundaries, asking for help, saying no, or delegating to others, at work or home. We may have been shamed for these as well.

These beliefs can block our ability to prioritize rest for ourselves. To break through, the first step is to “open the hood” to identify and address the issues. Here are a few practices that I’ve found helpful:

• A body scan meditation, like this one, not only helps us notice where we’re clenching muscles or harboring physical pain but can also bring to the surface pent-up emotions or memories that need processing.
• Havening touch, which is a practice that involves rubbing our palms together or stroking our face slowly and gently to calm our nervous system. This helps us to drop into our body and connect with our inner wisdom.  (Check out meditations from Hello Inner Light on YouTube.)
• Reflecting in a journal, especially after one of the above practices, helps us dive deeper into whatever comes up. Those emotions and memories hold important clues about what’s ailing our engine. (See below for journaling prompts.)

As we become more aware, we can take the next step of getting more intentional about how, where, and with whom we invest our energy.

Of course, this often means setting (or resetting) boundaries, which strikes fear in the heart of many. If it does, the above practices can shed light on why and develop more clarity around ways to move forward.

Your check engine light 

Just like our planet, our natural resources are not unlimited. Mother Nature has been putting up with a LOT for decades and now she’s screaming NO big time.

It’s important to remember that how we treat ourselves impacts our personal vibration—and that reverberates into the world around us. By caring for our own resources, we help care for the greater good, too.

Remember that big changes begin with small steps. As Neil Armstrong was quoted during the 1969 moonwalk, “That’s one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.”

This year, commit to doing at least one small (or big) thing to protect your energy. That simple action will help provide the fuel needed to shift from idling in neutral to cruising in drive — not blindly on autopilot but purposefully on a path of our own choosing.

 

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Journaling prompts for assessing energy:

• When growing up, did my caregivers demonstrate a healthy balance of work and rest? How might that be reflected in my choices now?
• How did I spend my time today/yesterday? Is there something I didn’t get to do that I wanted to do? Why? What held me back?
• What are my personal “tells” that my engine light is on? How can I use that awareness to take better care of myself?
• Do boundaries cause anxiety for me? Does it happen with certain people or situations? Did I say yes to something I wish I hadn’t? Why?
• What one small step could I take to conserve some of my energy? Where might I channel that back into myself?