Attracting the sweet nectar of success

Our busy-as-bees brains process about 11 million pieces of information per second. Talk about making our heads spin! Obviously, most of this activity happens beneath our conscious awareness. Our brains buzz around a field of infinite possibilities, picking and choosing what deserves or needs attention. That typically comes from two ends of the spectrum: what’s familiar, and therefore attractive, and what poses a threat to be avoided. But for human beings, seeking familiarity and avoiding potential danger can keep us from attracting the sweet nectar of success.

Sleeping with the past

If your hive is bursting with honey, say thank you! Because you likely received conditioning that provided a wonderful foundation for life. But if you’re a dedicated worker bee who feels frustrated and blocked from attracting the sweet life, it may be time to take a break and ask why.

Like analyzing the soil before planting, we need to understand the programming that supports or stunts our growth. Even before we consciously remember, our brains began processing sensory input from our environment and forming neural pathways that reflect our beliefs.

Positive imprints of love and acceptance generate positive pathways, enabling us to blossom with self-confidence, security, and trust. On the flip side, negative experiences of shame and rejection breed negative pathways, stunting our growth with fear, anxiety, doubt, and distrust.

The more frequent or intense the sensations, the deeper the neural pathways—positive or negative. They’re especially impactful when delivered by people we trust, like parents, pastors, or teachers.

This network of neural pathways becomes our map of the world and our personal framework for how we see our place in it. If we’re not happy with certain aspects of our lives, we may want to evaluate the map we’ve been following. Not to find fault necessarily, but to identify which pathways aren’t serving us and create new ones.

Shining the light of awareness

Some of us would rather not open what may seem like a Pandora’s Box of our past. But when we choose to remain ‘blissfully’ unaware of it, we carry our past into our present. By shining the light of awareness into our deepest, darkest neural pathways, we can transform them into wisdom, insight, and our own sweet nectar of success.

Ever explode in anger or sob uncontrollably over something seemingly insignificant? Continually put up with bad behavior from others? Act in ways that sabotage your happiness or success?

That’s a Pandora moment.

We often feel embarrassed, frustrated, and confused when these happen. Please don’t! Because they’re our spirit’s cry for attention—and ripe with opportunities for insight, growth, and transformation.

Peering into Pandora’s Box

The typical reaction when Pandora explodes is to blame and judge ourselves—or blame who or what triggered us. Either way, we’re not getting to the root of the problem. We wouldn’t blame a tomato plant for not growing. We’d probably visit a garden center for advice or go online to gain some insight and direction.

Why not take the same approach here? Talk to a counselor or coach for some guidance and support. Or try some of these very effective DIY approaches:

• Journaling, with a focus on old thought patterns, memories, and feelings that need attention.
• Joining a 12-step program, like Alanon, or any support group focused on connecting and sharing.
• Reading books, especially memoirs, that offer insight, inspiration, and empowerment.

It’s amazing what we discover when we simply choose to open the lid and observe.

Resetting our foundation

After digging in, we can apply the magic of neural plasticity — which is the ability of the brain to continue to grow and adapt. As children, we accepted everything at face value. As adults, we can observe the past in the light of the present then carve new neural pathways of our choosing.

How, you ask? One deceptively simple way is by practicing positive affirmations. These are intentional, present tense statements that begin with ‘I am.’ Start with I am loved, I am worthy, I am deserving. As you identify negative beliefs, just write an opposite ‘I am’ statement.

By writing and saying affirmations repeatedly, we begin to carve fresh, new neural pathways in our brains while weakening old, outdated ones. It’s like sunshine on a tiny seedling that helps it grow stronger and thrive.

Sounds a little simplistic, doesn’t it? But the simple things are often the most effective. Yet, they also seem to be the most challenging to squeeze into our busy-as-bees lives—like drinking lots of water or getting ample sleep. Change, as we know, takes daily practice, just like yoga, meditation, or any other form of self-care.

Here comes the sun

Affirmations are also a great tool for balancing our natural negativity bias, which is another one of our brain’s survival mechanisms. It’s our tendency to focus on negativity, like worries, fears, criticism, and anxieties, vs. positive thoughts at a rate of about four to one. As humans, we average about 50,000 to 80,000 thoughts per day. Imagine how much those negative thoughts build up over time?

While the brain’s defenses are just trying to keep us alive, they can also prevent us from truly thriving. Without conscious intervention, negativity can grow like a dusty film on the window of our souls, blocking sunlight from showering us with warmth and light.

Attracting the sweet nectar of success

Mapping our own path to happiness is not only good for us personally—it’s good for the world, too. While bees collect pollen to make honey, they in turn pollinate plants to promote flowering. By transforming past conditioning into a catalyst for positive change, we spread strength, power, and joy into the world—and we inspire others to do so, too. That’s how we all go about attracting the sweet nectar of success.

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I’m a holistic life coach who specializes in expressive writing to nurture healing, insight, and creativity. Check out more inspirational articles at my blog, Good Vibrations. For more information about life coaching, visit my website at www.manifestwithmargrita.com.  If you have a question or topic you’d like me to write about here, or would like to join my Good Vibrations email community, email me at [email protected]. And follow me on Instagram, Facebook, and LinkedIn!